Following our very powerful September event facilitated by Claudia Roth of Soul Luxury, when we explored the new way of doing business which is learning to ‘allow’, Claudia has shared this blog with us:
My reality was shaken when I was in Auroville in the south of India last November! For many years (even decades) I created this special self-image called Claudia Roth, a successful global business leader who much enjoyed a career in luxury hospitality. I was very proud of my self-image which I curated with passion and careful attention.
Something profound happened!
No doubt you’ve heard people saying, ‘This is who I am and I won’t change!’ Leaders who maintain this position are unconsciously admitting they can’t see beyond their self-image.
To be fixated by self-image means to be non-creative and, in essence, limited to a defined set of often rigid thought processes and beliefs; this has consequences for all aspects of life.
Without realising it, many of us have created identities – or self-images – of ourselves.
Perhaps you have an image of yourself as important, as a successful businessperson, as ambitious and competent, or as someone who has all the answers. This sort of identity, built up over years, governs your view of the world more than you realise.
Jim Morrison – lead singer of The Doors – said: “We're locked in an image, an act - and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image, they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains.”
Holding onto this adopted identity is like wearing a professional mask; with it in place, either in business or in life, you are not allowing yourself to be truly authentic and importantly, you are limiting yourself to new awareness so as to evolve as a business leader and individual.
Is it possible to maintain a professional identity or self-image for years and not even be aware of it? Trust me, I speak from experience – I only realised that ‘the other’ persons were there (yes ... you read correctly .... we have not only one self image but several!) when I began to question why I thought and reacted in the ways that I did.
Indeed, it is only when we start exploring our genuine thoughts, reactions, emotions and ways of living that we can begin to live in the truest sense of ourselves. And if you have reaffirmed and energised a mask successfully for many years, it can be a painstaking process to dismantle it to discover who you really are!
So, why would you want to move beyond this learned identity – your cherished self-image – especially if it has been serving you well for many years as in my instance?
The more authentic you become, the more you step into your ‘space of greatness’. You no longer pretend to be somebody else, running on ‘patterns’ or be guided to uphold your self-images. Instead you connect to your inner wisdom, which then guides you throughout your life.
As you explore your self-image, you will start challenging certain beliefs and removing others that may be limiting you. You will find yourself wanting to know the world for what it actually is, rather than what you believe it to be. You will become curious again. Creativity and inspiration will flourish as a result, becoming assets both in your life and your business. Unimaginable opportunities are unfolding!
Embarking on this process isn’t easy. It won’t provide a quick fix to all of life’s challenges. But it is a powerful experience that will connect you to your truth and inner wisdom, where you will find contentment, joy and guidance, and your next level of personal and business success.
I will be returning to Auroville soon again .... The story continues.
1. Start off by naming the labels you give to yourself. For example, “I am a successful, highly in demand, creative and outspoken manager.” Write down your labels.
2. Identify the labels you wish to dissolve and make a commitment to move closer to your ideal life situation.
3. Create some time for reflection, to explore what lies behind the labels you identify.
4. Pay attention to the story you create when you look in the mirror: do you create a negative or a positive self-image, or an over-inflated self-image guided by ego?
5. Observe your opinions: what you say, how you say it, the likes and dislikes you use to reinforce your self-image. Do you judge fairly or based on pre-conceived ideas?
6. Explore how tied you are to your memories: whether good or bad, acting in response to memories can lead to inauthentic results, from irrational fears to rose-tinted actions.
7. Take time to assess how your story, opinions, actions and reactions would be if you created them anew based on what you actually see, think and feel.
Enjoy discovering yourself! Awareness creates choice.
A little about me: I am grateful to look back at a successful, global and hugely rewarding international career in the luxury hospitality & travel industry. I have learned what luxury is and what it is not. I understand service excellence, and I know what it is not! I have travelled the world in style and had many enjoyable moments of living a corporate career.
Having now moved on from corporate life, my network describes me as a global pioneer in luxury and consciousness. People are seeking increased meaning and connection – in their lives and the brands they align with. But whether an individual or a company, true connection can only come from within: from an exploration of awareness and an unwavering commitment to authenticity and integrity.
I am the founder and Managing Director of Soul Luxury, a company operating globally that helps businesses understand these evolutionary shifts and create their own new currency of connection within themselves and with their clients.
I write articles from time to time. There is no right or wrong, it is only a view. Up to now largely my silent view.
Claudia Roth
Copyright © 2016 Soul Luxury.
The US election is nearing its conclusion. Whatever happens now, November 2016 will be a landmark date in history. For the ugliness of this election has exposed the failure of the US democratic process in that two highly unsuitable and unpopular candidates have polarised views and torn the American nation apart.
During the next week many unprecedented events may happen and each time the whole world will be shaken up. The leadership of the American nation affects every single one of us.
It has taken me a while to realise that while I do not endorse either candidate, Donald Trump's significant role in this election and in the future of humanity has been to awaken millions of people all over the world to the failure of the democratic system. If he were not an outsider and the kind of person he has shown himself to be, he would never have had the thick skin to stand up to the vitriol directed at him (most of it of course, rightly) and would not have become this year's presidential candidate. Hillary has been supported throughout by the mainstream media. But it is Donald who pulls in the crowds because he is expressing what so many Americans feel - that their country and their media and their governmental structures are not working for them. For that reason millions of people are able to forgive his many character flaws because they have recognised that America needs to change and they only see Donald as offering that hopeful possibility to them.
We do not know what will happen during the next fortnight. Whatever the news may bring, it is important to stay centred and calm and not to give our energy over to fear or to anxiety. Instead we can choose to focus on a vision of love, kindness, tolerance, peace, joy and all the good things that every human being wants to have in their lives. We can focus on those things not just for ourselves but for everyone all over the world and especially all those who are struggling to survive and those who are living in war-torn nations.
Each time you find yourself giving way to a darker thoughts, remind yourself to focus on positive energy, rather than negative. Raise your energy as high as you can for that is the only way to create a better world for all of us. Whatever may happen during the next fortnight we need to focus on whatever comes to pass being in the best interests of all of humanity (even though we may not recognise it at the time) and we must set our intention and our hopes for that to be achieved.
I have been re-visiting my ideas about mindfulness in the last few days in preparation for an event which I am facilitating.
I first came across the term ‘mindfulness’ many years ago when I was sent an early copy of Jon Kabat-Zinn’s book, Wherever You go, There You Are, with a view to my being the UK publisher for it. Jon Kabat-Zinn had taken ideas from ancient Buddhist practices and explored how to make them accessible to the mainstream. He believed that Western society had lost touch with the universal human qualities of paying attention and living with awareness.
This was 1994 and the thinking behind the book was all completely new to us at Piatkus. We had published books on meditation but this was so much more.
In the introduction the author explains that ‘wherever you go, there you are. Whatever you are thinking right now, that’s what’s on your mind.’ It looks at first like a simple observation but in fact it requires much practice and self-awareness to observe your thoughts in this way. The important question we must each ask ourselves is how best to respond to any given situation in which we find ourselves and the answer to that question lies in responding with your full awareness to whatever is going on for you right there in that moment.
Whatever has happened has already happened. The future is unknown. When we can truly learn to live in the present, to ‘be in touch with where we already are’, then we are in a situation where we have the most to gain for we can understand more of ‘the truth’ of what we are really experiencing and ideally respond with wisdom and heartfelt understanding.
I took the book to the editorial meeting and we were all keen to go ahead. But the ideas were so new at the time, that we thought we would need to change the title of the book or we would have difficulty in selling it into the bookshops (this was long before the days of amazon). Accordingly we retitled it Mindfulness Meditation for Everyday Life. We printed an initial edition of 3000 copies. The Daily Mail wrote a piece about it which resonated so profoundly that the book sold out within a week. It nevertheless took many years before it was taken up by psychotherapists as a tool to help their patients and subsequently the concept of mindfulness found its way into the NHS and after that became mainstream.
Now mindfulness has become an industry. People know that practising mindfulness is good for them but they are not sure why. It takes time to become mindful of who we are as individuals, how we respond to different situations in the way that we do, whether we are truly living our lives the way we want to, whether we are living from our hearts.
Mindfulness has been an extraordinary gift to the world. and the gifts it offers are available to each and every one one of us every day of our lives – as long as we are aware when we are truly ‘there’.
For those interested you can click here to purchase or review Jon Kabat - Zinn's book: Wherever You Go, There You Are.
ConsciousCafe celebrated its 5th birthday at the beginning of July with a lively party for 50 people. 6 of them had been at the original ConsciousCafe group launch in 2011.
Kenny and Judy jointly compered and introduced Viv Garbe who opened the party with a beautifully delivered meditation to bring peace to the world.
We then took 2 minutes to introduce ourselves to someone in the room whom we had never met before to ask the question ‘How did you become spiritual?’ This led to some beautiful stories and sharing moments.
In typical ConsciousCafe style everyone was then offered discussion options. Choices included ‘Where does Happiness come from?’ or ‘Who are you?’ and for those who felt like something more lighthearted, you could choose a miscellaneous card with a provocative question on it and explore that in groups.
It was a bright summers evening and light seemed to stream through the windows and fill the room. We shared another short meditation and a moving closing circle, taking time to celebrate everyone connecting for this lovely anniversary. The moment was captured with a group photo and we all sang 'Happy Birthday'.
By then we were all starving and enjoyed supper, more conversation and birthday cake.
It was truly a special evening, beautifully captured with many excellent photos by Jon, which you can find on our Facebook page, here.
David Furlong’s latest book, Illuminating the Shadow, is a wonderful, erudite account of the human psyche, particularly in its wounded and hidden aspects. First we are introduced to the concept of the Shadow in films, literature, myth, metaphor and Fairy Tales, before learning how it manifests at a personal, public and collective level. Finally, we are taught how to learn from and integrate this aspect of ourselves, and of the human condition.Illuminating the Shadowis full of practical insights drawn from Furlong’s work as a therapist, with exercises to help the reader explore and make peace with him or herself. It is the sort of book that deserves more than one reading; that asks to be borrowed and lent so that the wisdom contained within can be shared as widely as possible.
Dr Fiona Bowie, King’s College London & the Afterlife Research Centre
author of the best selling Anthropology of Religion (Blackwell)
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Illuminating the Shadow explores a rich breadth of academic knowledge and everyday life experience with great depth and wisdom. Scholarly exposition of shadow through history, the arts and sciences provides far-reaching insights for human nature and global society. Story, myth and metaphor show how we express and try to understand our own complexity, divine mystery and the struggle between good and evil at personal and collective levels. And bringing dark psyche into the light shows shadow in relief, not to be eliminated but illuminated since, in its vital integrative function, it is both teacher and healer. Therapeutic examples and exercises in shadow work demonstrate the journey into light and compassionate love, with free will continuously informed by evolving consciousness, that points us towards full relationship with the living human God, and with our selves and each other. For the advancement of mental and spiritual health, this eminently practical book deserves a wide readership.
Dr David McDonald, Consultant Psychiatrist and Advisor in the Church of England’s Healing Ministry
To purchase from Amazon, click below:
The indoors Wormwood Scrubs Pony Centre was built as part of Anneka Rice’s Challenge programme in the ‘80s and does incredibly important work to improve the lives of disabled people. 40 of us arrived there on a warm light summer evening, excited as to what we might learn and some of us a little apprehensive having never worked alongside horses before.
How do we Lead in a time of Uncertainty
Jude explained that we can learn a lot about leadership from horses because they have no agenda. Working with horses is working with uncertainty and as all leaders must work with uncertainty, the horses mirror how each of us leads in situations and times of uncertainty.
Four volunteers chose to work with two beautiful horses and each of them took a turn leading one of the horses around the arena while the audience observed closely their leadership style. Leading a horse can be difficult for no one knows how the horses will respond. Each volunteer revealed how the experience had felt for them and what they had learned.
What Part do We Play in the Team?
Jude and Emma then invited all the participants into the arena with the horses and gave each of us the opportunity to explore how we lead – from the front, from the side or from behind. They presented new ways of thinking about our position in the team and gave us the opportunity to experience how this felt as we all took part in a simple group exercise.
In a final task, all those who particularly wanted to work with the horses stayed in the arena and completed an activity which involved working in teams and leading the horses through an obstacle course. As I watched this final exercise from the audience stand, I felt a lump come into my throat. People who had never met before had worked beautifully as a team with two very wise animals to move in seamless flow and harmony. I thought that the exercise also reflected the energy of people who come to ConsciousCafe, trusting, present, intuitive, thoughtful, caring.
At the end of the session everyone had the opportunity to be with the horses in the arena and to share in groups what they had experienced and what they had learned about their own leadership style and capabilities. Everyone departed the event with new knowledge about themselves, learned in the most memorable and unique way.
Huge thanks to Jude and Emma for giving their time and for sharing their expertise. If you want to learn more, you can read Jude’s book Leadership Beyond Measure, details of which are on the books page at ConsciousCafe. Emma told us the remarkable story of the Pony centre and if you would like to volunteer there, you can learn more here.
Judy
ConsciousCafe Founder
ConsciousCafe is a not-for-profit organisation, a friendly and welcoming community, a place to live life consciously.